Writing Contest - Sentences I Never Thought I Would Say Or Hear: Volume Eleven
In Which I Say and Hear All Kinds of Bizarre Things, You Use Those Things As Writing Prompts, and The Winner Takes Glory, Bragging Rights, and a Free Year Of The Starfire Codes on Substack....
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SENTENCES, VOLUME ELEVEN - THE RULES:
Use one or more of these collected sentences in a story, a script, a piece of original music, or a poem that you write.
No editing the prompts. They must remain intact.
Post a link to the story, poem, music, or script you have written in the comments of this article so I can find them and so that others may enjoy reading these too.
This link you provide will serve as your “entry.”
The link must be listed in the comments of this article below in order to qualify as an entry.
I will read all of these and choose a winner. I am a human being. I promise nothing but my own subjectivity as a judge. It’s the best I’ve got, so it will have to do.
You may comment as much as you like, but only enter one piece for consideration. I only have one me, so unless one of you can clone me, you are only allowed to enter once.
The winner gets glory, bragging rights, and a free year of SFC on Substack.
You have until November 30, 2024, to submit your entry in the comments below.
After that, I will create another post in which I will link all of the entries and announce the winners.
And without further ado, here’s the prompt list for Volume Eleven….
Sentences I Never Thought I Would Say
I kind of wonder if you get extra credit in homeschool for deceiving beavers.
We're waiting to see if the beavers rebuild the dam. The suspense is killing me.
All hail tiny Mexican girl's defeat of psycho knife girl!!
Rizz juice duckie salutes you!
Apparently, pondering his orb makes his Brilloesque chest hair sparkle. I don't want to know.
I hope it doesn't create weird dynamic putty inside your body.
I'm in December. I'm a time traveler.
I know you're tending to your beaver, but something is beeping....
Fake ass pandas can't even figure out how to procreate. They just roll around, eat bamboo, and die.
And with that, normalcy disappeared in a puff of logic....
That gif database leads to some alternate dimension.
"Fish people" makes me wonder if they have fish cloacas, human genitals... por que no los tres?!?!
Us Jew broads are kind of fish person jiggy prohibitive.
Let alone the rando body parts in the fridge next to the egg salad.
Sentences I Never Thought I Would Hear
I want a fancy helmet with something wild on it, like a sniper periscope disco ball thing.
How 'bout some Tiny Tim next time? Tiptoe thru the Tulips an' shit...
100 percent Nazi monkey suckage.
Russians are a lot like pitbulls.
You're not fine! You still have PTSD from four episodes ago!
I will win that war if I can get that beaver deceiver built!
Those are mountain beavers! Those don't look like OUR beavers!
Perhaps the humans could help the beavers engineer the dam away from the tree. The first human-beaver collaboration.
I'm gonna go check my beaver problem.
Let's go stop these beavers.
These beavers can't be stopped!
I am no longer worried about beet butt. I am now a machine that converts beets directly into righteous indignation.
Wing dip fuels shenanigans!
It occurred to me while unperturbedly sautéing peppers and steak in a mound of beef tallow.
I'm buying this excavator from Temu.
Fuck that rock-the-baby fat-ass!
The guys are using Swahili again!
I'm the fluffer for the purse-cocks.
Okay, well I don’t know any dog-friendly ways to commit ant genocide.
"Normal" is overrated. Also, entirely subjective. I have no idea what it actually is. I suspect it's a myth.
I feel like the only thing that can calm me down right now is half an hour of peacock noises.
Totally tense. I need a xanax sandwich.
That *may* have been the only kind of boner that--KA CHOW!--our boy HP would have signed off on.
So you’re saying our boi HP wasn’t getting WITH the fish people in THAT way?
I love Howard dearly, but the fact that he married a *Jewish* woman was a huge step for him lol. I am quite certain he would not have been getting jiggy with THE FISH PEOPLE.
Oh, no, you invoked the cloaca.
Don't forget the placentas.
I never rabbit holed this duo toned fluff claw machine prize!
OCTOBER 2024 WINNERS:
THANK YOU SO MUCH to all of the participants for playing the game with us and making this an absolute blast!! 🙏🏻💜💫
🎉🥳🎉 Congratulations!!! 🙏🏻💜💫
Special thanks to , , , , , , Ian, Jack Everly, , , , Scott, Shannon, , and Taoist Sage as well as all of the participants and winners!
The beaver war is still in effect. Scott's involved and now I think we are going to win.
lol!